Bad Dreams, Bad Days.

I had a really terrible dream last night. I remember it super vividly, which is even weirder.

I dreamed my sister and I were kidnapped by Nazis and we were in this room that was all wood and there were white shears blowing in the wind. We were trying to plan our escape when the Nazis came in the room and we started praying. I was praying and she was holding my hands. They shot me in the head. Kari was crying. The walked out of the room and I said to her, "Finish praying." I wasn't dead. And I felt no pain. She kept praying and finished the prayer and I just laid there. The Nazis came back in and I played dead. I moved and the Nazis shot me in the head again and they stayed there. Kari was crying even more, but she wasn't hurt. The Nazis stayed in the room this time and Kari thought I was dead, but again I wasn't. I opened my eyes and looked at her, and closed my eyes so that she would know I was alive. Suddenly, we were carried to this kitchen. Like a big industrial sized kitchen. I was thrown on a bench and Kari was made to cook. Justin from Carrabba's showed up in a Nazi uniform and walked into the kitchen. He saw me and saw me breathing. He talked all the other people into leaving the room and letting him supervise. He told me to keep playing dead and when they discarded my body I would be able to escape. A captain came into the room and saw me breathe and I was shot in the chest. This one I felt (I guess I was having acid reflux or something in my sleep) and I was in pain, but was still alive. We were all taken outside into the woods. I was thrown aside and Kari ran to me, Justin was right beside us. The Nazis started opening fire with a machine gun but we were down the hill under a trench. Justin grabbed me and ran to his car and took me to a house in the mountains. I woke up.

WHAT THE HELL DID I EAT.

I woke up on time w/o an alarm, I got dressed, left my phone at home by accident, I have been forgetting stuff and leaving stuff all day. It's rainy and weird outside.

IDK. I hate weird dreams. I feel guilty because Kari got left behind and it didn't even really happen.

Do-Overs

I have had more "fresh starts" than I know what to do with. So many people complain about second chances, I've had what? 1....2....3.....4...5 now? I just can't believe the chances I've had and wasted. This time, I hope my Do-Over sticks.

I am moved into my apartment, started my new job. Done training. Selling cars tomorrow. I meet new people every day, and every new person is an opportunity to make my life better. I'm just so darn optimistic right now! I have a job where I have the chance to make a lot of money, and in my area all the other sales people are doing super well for themselves. Why not me? I'm very confident that I will do well here. Plus the environment is suitable for me, I have a nice office with a huge window and I don't have to wear a tacky uniform and apron, I have a lot of freedom and I like it a lot so far. Though I am only four days in.

My things are all moved into my new place and I can't wait to see it. Momma warned me that my furniture is a little big and not to get upset, but honestly I'm sure it's probably fine. If it's not, I'm sure there'll be a post about it tomorrow.

I won't get home til pretty late tonight, I don't get out of work until nine and I have to stop by Mama's and pick up a few things like my cell phone charger and some clothes for tomorrow and a shower curtain. I won't even get to Ma's til about 9:15, then I'll be there gathering stuff and socializing til at least 9:30 or 9:45. That puts me at 10:00 at least. Then I have to get home and put stuff away and set stuff up and blah blah blah. I'll be in bed pretty late I reckon.

Tomorrow I work 9 to 7, I'm excited about that because it's kind of boring between 7 and 9 it seems. I have a couple people coming in to by cars from me in the next week, I love knowing people and being outgoing. It really works for me.

It's a good feeling to be on top of things. I have a nice apartment, (even if it is 18 years old, it's still super nice.) a real job, and a loving family this always just a phone call away. It really can't get much better!

I'm all hyped up on coffee and soda. Oy. I'm bouncing off the walls a little for sure, but hey, at least I'll have the energy to do all the stuff I have to do tonight :-)

Better than I expected.

I'm doing much better moneywise than I thought. So relieved. 

Started my new job today, it's nice to dress nice for work and have my own office. Also, it seems that they get plenty of business so I hope to sell my first car on Saturday. I'm confident that I will be able to do it! YAH!

I'm feeling way better about everything. I can't wait to get into my new place! Todd and Alex are going to be moving my big furniture in, apparently, every day this week while I'm at work. I didn't ask them to do this, I really think Todd just wants something to do. None the less, I'm grateful for the moving help. If I get my bed moved in, I can sleep there tomorrow :-) Todd and I are going down around 9 so I can sign the papers and he can help me during the walk through cause I know I wont see anything. I go to work at 11. I'm leaving work at 3 to move stuff in. The best part is that I make salary right now so it doesn't even matter that I'm leaving early tomorrow! YAY! 

I'm just so darn excited I can't even stand it! 

Meh.

The person that was stalking all my online stuff isn't doing so anymore, and it makes me feel better to blog, so here I am again.

I move into my new place in three days. I had to switch insurance agents to get renter's insurance and jump through hoops to get my electricity switched over, but it's done now. I'm broke. I wasn't accounting for all the down payments for everything, and I only made 1,000 dollars last month at Ihop. If I can just make it through the next two weeks I'll get my first paycheck from my new job and my last paycheck from my old one.

Speaking of new jobs: I got hired as a salesperson at Randy Marion. I don't know if this is a good thing or bad thing, but I'm pretty good at selling things and I have the opportunity to make a lot of money. Or not. "You get out what you put in." Said the guy that hired me. So if I sell no cars, I make no money. O yay.

I can't wait for things to get better. I'm so stressed out about money that I'm considering backing out of my apartment all together. I know that two weeks from now I'll be in good shape, but what about until then? I have NO left over money. At all. I had 200 dollars extra aside from my rent, and I had to spend that yesterday to get insurance. How am I going to eat in the next two weeks? How am I going to get anywhere with no gas? Is this worth it? I hope so. I'm exaggerating a little bit, I'll probably be staying here until sometime next week because no one will be able to help me move, but that just covers food. Gas is an issue. Serious one. I'm so screwed. Maybe I'm over reacting. I don't know.

On the upside, in two weeks I'll be more than OK in the money department. O yay.

Even though I am super stressed out about it, I am also really excited about my apartment. I can't wait to get in there, put up curtains, place my furniture, put up my porch swing, and have a place that is all me. No room mates. Just me. Also the weight room is 24 hour access. Since I'll be too poor to do anything else for a little while, I plan to spend a lot of time in that room.

I'm not going to get cable or internet until I have things budgeted out and I know what I can and can't afford. So it's also a good thing that there is a 24 hour business center with internet at my apartment too. Maybe I'll waste less time online because I'll have to walk down there. I'll definitely be in bed earlier.

I am paying my car/renter's insurance quarterly, so I don't have to pay anything on that again until November 11th. That makes me happy.

I'm as serious as a heart attack when I say that in two weeks I will be more than ok on money. I don't want to lose my apartment all together just because I'm going to have a tough two weeks. Here I am weighing out the pros and cons, Should I get my apartment and be broke and miserable and worried for two weeks, or should I lose my apartment (which is something that makes me happy and proud of myself) and stay here but have two weeks of financial peace? I think it is worth it to move. If I can just find like 15 dollars for gas for the next two weeks I will be ok. (Which I might find, I find money all the time)

I should stop freaking out. I am such a Stressed-out Sally! Of course I'm going to move into my apartment. I have already paid my first three months of insurance. My electricity goes into my name on tuesday. I have the furniture for it in storage. If worse comes to worse, I'll take back my bathroom shelf and then buy it again in two weeks. I just need to calm down. Calm down. Calm down....1...2....3....4....5....6...7.....8.....9...10. I do feel a little better. Sometimes all it takes is a little reasoning with myself. Am I going crazy?

This is my last blog post.

I'm am so angry. I'm fuming. I will no longer be posting anything in this blog because I have learned that it is not wise to do so. If I figure out how to delete this I will, as well as all my other accounts on the internet. 

I might start new ones, I might not.  

I am so angry. I'm tired of paying for other people's mistakes. This is not acceptable. I'm not going to say why I'm angry because it is done. It is not repairable. I'm not one to hold a grudge, but this will probably stick for a while. I'm so mad I'm crying. 

Tomorrow is my day off, I'm excited about it really. I have been working a lot lately which is an amazing change from not working enough. I really feel confident that I will save a ton of money between now and August 11th. But anyway, I told my Mommy that I would clean the house up tomorrow so I decided to make out a schedule so that I would get everything done and still do other stuff with my day. I used to do this all the time in college just to ensure that I would get everything done.  

Friday, July 10^th, 2009

7:45 a.m. Wake up

8:00 a.m. Gym

9:30 a.m. Breakfast (one egg, cereal, 2% milk)

10:00 a.m. meditation

10:30 a.m. Dust ceilings, fans, and baseboards using the fluffy in the pantry (fluffy is the affectionate name I have created for the duster) Dust Kitchen and Dining Room

11:00 a.m. Snack (water and dried fruit mix)

11:30 a.m. Wipe down Dining Room table, legs, and chairs

12:00 p.m. go swimming (if raining, laundry)

1:00 p.m. Lunch (leftover gnocchi chicken soup and mozzarella biscuits…..omg so bad for me and so worth it)

1:30 p.m. Sweep (Kitchen, Office, Bathroom, Foyer)

2:00 p.m. Internet time

3:00 p.m. Clean toilet and sink

3:30 p.m. snack (water, dry cereal)

4:00 p.m. Mop (Kitchen, Office, Bathroom, Foyer) with swiffer

4:30 p.m. go for walk/jog (if raining, early shower and maybe nap)

5:00 p.m. shower

5:30 p.m. family time

10:30 p.m. Bed time

Broke the fool out of my phone. I have to buy a new one next week but I'm putting it off until I just can't stand it any more. I will probably get a real nice one though whenever I do get one, I am so tired of my Razr!

Momma told me I can invite Kirk over for dinner tomorrow night. We aren't exclusive or serious or anything, I kind of think we are just friends. I don't know if I will have him over or not. We'll see I reckon. 

JULY!

So I haven't posted in a good while, not like anyone is upset about it, but whatever. Sorry nonexistent readers! 

Update:

I moved out of Lew's house and into my Mom's. I know, most people would say that's a step backwards...BUT....I am saving money for MY NEW APARTMENT THAT I AM MOVING INTO AUGUST 11TH!!!!! I'm pumped to say the least. 

I have all the furniture except my bedroom furniture. 

It has two pools, three tennis courts, a 24 hour fitness room, running trails, 854 square feet, and O MY GOD IT IS GORGEOUS. 

I am so happy. I am not depressed any more, on the contrary I'm super happy. 

My brother is a little jerk though, and keeps my mom torn up. I could smack him in the face. It's whatever though. 

I am job hunting right now for a place to work that is closer to my NEW APARTMENT. So basically, life is good and stuff. 

The end.